1. |
A Welcome
02:10
|
|||
|
a welcome can be more than the wave of a hand
but I don’t think that I have more in me
a bee can float like light under its weight
but I don’t think that I have that in me
if the moon could be a pearl then I’m a gate
I’ll never know how to ask someone to stay
you try hard not to stare in the wrong way
really I have to try too
now you have to try not to flinch when you see me
the truth is that I have to try too
I have to try because it’s all I can do
I cry because it’s all I can do
if I could be a tree here’d follow songs
I wanna listen with you all day long
|
||||
2. |
Hotel
02:52
|
|||
|
I like to think; more accurate to say that I daydream
I’ll pretend to date September to make winter jealous of me
daydreams; you don’t know what I mean
attack me quietly; so forcefully sometimes
and just for once I wanna be like them
not to be born in a skin just to grow against it
and just for once I wanna feel something
there’s mildew on the drywall and it is spreading
now I’ve watched the women dance with the men
and I know I’ll never move in step with them
some pains in life are smooth
some pains can’t be pulled from the root
|
||||
3. |
Reef
02:43
|
|||
|
the greenspace air in my lungs is cold
I crumbled over myself; I never let me unfold
not quite smart and not quite funny
I’m thinking no one could ever love me
and the branches of the trees
stick out like little pieces of the sea
(if I could) give it to you baby I would pin it to the air
(if I could) give it to you baby I would open up the ground
and plant a city
and see if you would wanna stay with me
weight of the wind on my clothes is a hand on my skin
the moon is under the water and can I swim down to it?
wanted to wear a dress to the party
but I’m ugly and I’m tall and I always stop me
when I reach out to touch the leaves
I swear I’m as gentle as I can be
(if I could) give it to you baby I would pin it to the air
(if I could) give it to you baby I’d pull water over ground
and comb ocean through the trees
I’d promise to do anything
but then he says what’s wrong with me
so I hide or I change everything and then he leaves me instead
|
||||
4. |
Rest Evil
03:44
|
|||
|
and what is it you think you want to be to me?
do you know that I can cast a pall over some of the living?
I am living; I am tall; I am livid — even at the sun today
and how its light can be a guide to let me bristle at the smallest of things
know that I can be the bitterest root that I can take
I am far lower than the things at which I levy my hate
|
||||
5. |
Seth
02:51
|
|||
|
he still is something new to me
and he moves just like the air
like power; magic; fire unseen
we could take a walk
we could talk about our favorite songs
when music sounds the same to me
then I’ll see you and there is shade alight
on every color and I’ll feel alright for a while
what if I‘m poison that you take?
what if I’m holding you to shapes that you’ve outgrown?
what if I’ve tried to let you see more than I’ve tried to know?
when could I see you?
is it strange to write this to you?
you could come over and sit on the porch like you used to
hope that you’re doing alright
I am glad to know you
I am thinking about you tonight
|
||||
6. |
Baby Do You
02:59
|
|||
|
look out! I am at the middle of the fruit
look out! I am ugly and may be bruised
lookout, how are you today?
I’m freaking out — but the sky’s not even gray
I don’t understand what might be coming
how strange is it to admit that I might live past my twenties?
well I don’t know where I am going
but I hope I never get there if it means leaving you
well I don’t know what I am doing
baby do you?
baby do you
|
||||
7. |
Other Side
02:30
|
|||
|
I am on the other side of it
I am on the other side of living
the sun will come and bleach the wood on the porch
and then the rain will push his cigarettes through the planks
can I walk and be the plants?
can I walk and be the flowers?
can I walk so tall and alone on my path
that I see the road to our old house?
no more thinking are you mad
I can write songs and I can sing them again
now the leaves are falling and they’re fickle as they pass
and now you’re not there to glare when I laugh
and now I guess I can be anything
now I guess I should feel strong
but I just want to hear the rain fall on the window
and then feel it on my skin when it rolls off
then get dry and lay in my bed
and then try to forget the things you said
|
||||
8. |
Haunt
03:03
|
|||
|
a skeleton in your living room
and I feel like I’m haunting you through the night
I can’t find the reason why
I’m the air that you’re stepping through
and I feel like I’m robbing you of your time
I see stars in the daytime
and I’ll give you a piece of mind
is what I’d say if I was the kind
and now I’m standing by the hotel sign
and I catch the light like smoke in the night
and I undressed because it’s easier to hide
I was more alone with you
than I was with myself
when I wasn’t standing in your view
did you think about me at all?
I still dream about you now
and I feel some bitter some sad and some love
I was so alone when we met
I’d watch me from the black outside your window
I am always dancing somewhere different
I am a river split in two currents
I’m steel shining in the sun
bright from far away but I hurt to the touch
but I’m glad I have my friends
nothing lasts but in between
we fill between with what we can
|
||||
9. |
Psychic Past
01:36
|
|||
|
we decide to trap ourselves in amber and lose some years
I was stuck reaching towards you; your stare back to me just shrewd
if I’d known how heavy I would be by the end
fog of me in the other room; fog of you over my skin
I cried in every color but his vision was a dam
I blame me for what happened ‘cause I let it and ‘cause I can
I waited so long before I let it end
that I wonder if you tried to understand me to begin with
|
||||
10. |
Go
01:39
|
|||
11. |
Change
02:07
|
|||
|
finally in full color
looks like I did a bow to a power of the same as did my mother
like the earth is the source of the dirt
and the wind makes me see me in my clothes as the guise of another
grass over me as a blanket
there’s a man outside I wanna say hi and could we roll right on it?
and meet mirror eyes of shame
of a strength or a hate I contain else I with the whole world will sink
every year sets a brand new stranger in this skin
I can’t help but flinch when I look back at all of them
is it only time who has muddled my focus?
how was I who I am even when I didn’t really even know it?
|
||||
12. |
Z Song
03:44
|
|||
|
is it sad to see you?
or is it sad to see anyone?
I cry when anyone leaves
and then I fall into the sea and I look up to the waves
dreams shimmer from underneath
then these dreams fall to gentle faces of the people I meet
did you know I’m full of love?
did you know that I grow to the ceiling every morning?
that there’s never enough time?
that I fall short every day I’m alive? that we keep on living?
is it sad to see you?
or do I just feel like I’ll end up alone?
I am digging through the mud
and I plant as I go along but I can’t tell what’s growing
they say a body is just a church
I’m having trouble watching mine lurch and wasting in wanting
looking for the courage to look for love
I’m looking for the power to ask the earth
to make a tree to grow so slow with me
to learn to be better to the people around me
wanna go away with me across the street?
we could sit under the trees until it’s dark out
|
||||
Z Special Austin, Texas
Hiiiii I'm Zee (she/her). I make music as Z Special sometimes and I hope you like it :)
Z Special recommends:
nobody wouldn't see good things
by Lemon Meringue Die
I somehow just found this this past spring. Probably one of the most special and most lyrical releases I'm even aware of <3
go to album
all eyes on me ! when I walk in the door ! what's the biggest part that we can chop off n store ? what's the situation u think under the drawers ? that's a really weird question if u think abt it !
go to album
Fun and exciting noises and I'm so excited for more :)
go to albumIf you like Z Special, you may also like:
perfect forever
by sean thornton
The latest from sean thornton explores dark themes, but they’re handled with a delicate grace in these beautiful bedroom pop songs.
go to album
“Goodbye Max” is bedroom folk in the best sense of the phrase—vulnerable, melodic, and moving.
go to album
Passing Place
by Good Good Blood
featured on Bandcamp Radio Jun 14, 2016
go to album
